Four Fantastic Reasons why Captastic Bore will not succeed

Craptastic Bore

As everyone knows the new Fantastic Four has come out, and as everyone predicted it is doing terrible in the ratings, and in box office numbers, so this week I want to tackle why the Fantastic Four did terrible in the movie theatres, by giving you Four Fantastic reasons Craptastic Bore will not do well!

Fantastic #1- The fantastic four are not 4 edgy adults. That’s simply it, they are a family in the marvel comics that help and inspire everyone to do the best they can, and they travel all over the galaxy to find new and rare species and artifacts. While having a family type unite that inspires everywhere they go. Spoiler Alert! They don’t get drunk one night, and decide that because they couldn’t go on their exploration that they’re going to do some experiments themselves to gain their powers. Every single bad thing that happened in this movie was caused by them, and they didn’t save the world because they wanted to, they saved it because they had to save their own ass.  Also what a lame excuse for Benn not to say his famous line “It’s clobbering time!”End spoiler It’s almost a slap to the face to fans to try to change so much of the characters just try to fit into some edgy teen film. That’s not who they are, and who they ever will be.

Fantastic #2- Where did the budget go for this movie? The movie doesn’t even look like a 2015 movie. In fact the effects look like something that would have seemed average in the late 2000’s.  Clearly Fox rushed the movie out so they didn’t have to give the rights back to Marvel.  Also there were barely any advertising for this movie, and honestly if it wasn’t for me being a comic book movie fan, I probably wouldn’t even know a movie was coming out for this unless I left my TV on late at night, and I happened to look up during a commercial. Freaking Dragon Ball Z Resurrection of Frieza had more promotion than this, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they made comparable numbers in one week. Also the Thing looks incredibly stupid, he looked much better in the 2005 version of the movie, and he look much more menacing, and plus, where’s his pants? They didn’t have a budget for pants?

Fantastic # 3- Johnny being black- Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for black superheroes in mainstream media, and I know I can’t be the only one who’s pumped for T’Challa’s appearance in the new Captain America 3 movie, and his own movie; However I don’t think making a known white hero to be a black hero is the way to go about things. Especially if it doesn’t change or affect the story in anyway. You’re basically telling fans that the only reason he’s black is because you’re trying to fill some kind of quota, if you were trying to be different and innovated by bring in a racial change why not make Sue black too, and have a interracial superhero powerhouse couple, or better yet make Reed black and have the leader of the team be a black hero, which is also different in super hero media. Super hero fans all around the world have been asking for more leading female, minority roles for superheroes, and Michael B. will not be the answer for that. If anything when 2017 comes with Black Panther that will be are winning moment.

Fantastic # 4- We all wanted this movie to fail, and were going to look for reasons why it’s bad. It’s just that simple, at this point super hero fans want all the rights to go back to Marvel, so we can have one big share collective universe. With Fox having the rights to X-Men and Fantastic Four, it won’t be happening without the two powerhouse families. While X-Men won’t be going anytime soon, the fantastic four has shown numerous times that it can’t do well on the big screen. Hell even the comics for the FF aren’t doing so hot these days, and it is ok to wish and dream for the rights for this movie to go back to Marvel. However as we all know. If we look hard enough in anything we will eventually find it.

Thank you for reading, please like, comment, share, and subscribe, and tell me what movies you would like me to review. 🙂

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